Not too long after starting this site I was telling a friend of mine about it. Being a man he didn’t really get it, but thought it was kinda cool. He’s into tech stuff so he at least appreciated it. A few weeks later an Amazon box arrived on my doorstep, only I couldn’t remember ordering anything. But then, I have been known to order stuff and forget about it by the time it arrives the next day. When I saw Fifty Shades of Chicken in the box I wondered if I had ordered the book and forgot. I had seen the press for it and had considered it, but I didn’t think I had ordered it. Turns out I didn’t, my friend sent it to me as a present.
Once I got it though Mags, and I had a good laugh at the book and I never got around to writing a review. I’m not much of a cook, so I’m not going to talk much about the cooking advice.
The first thing I will say is that if you want to laugh while you cook, this is the book for you. The book is full of funny pictures and comments which will make the cooking experience more entertaining. It all starts with the introduction, which is written like Ana in Fifty Shades of Grey. Actually, the introduction to each section is a little extra piece of Fifty Shades of Grey, Chicken style. Ummm, we’ll if you’re into cooking it’s probably really hot.
Just like Christian and Ana, Fifty Shades of Chicken starts out Vanilla, as in Plain Vanilla Chicken. Of course, then there is the Popped-Cherry Pullet. Seriously! And the directions start with “Gently rub the naked chicken…” I’m not sure how you to Extra Virgin Breasts after that, but yes, you do get to rub the breasts.
The recipes do get more advanced as you go through the book, entering the realm of jealousy and bondage. Eventually you will have red cheeks, and I don’t think it’s from blushing, if you know what I mean.
Not kinky enough for you? How about a Spread Eagle Chicken? Thankfully the Safe Word Chicken doesn’t come with pictures!
But seriously, some of the pictures look absolutely delicious, ok, it’s a cookbook, they’re supposed to look good. But the recipes seem really tasty too. I may have to try cooking one of these days.
But I think I did find out why the chicken crossed the road – to get to Escala! Hey, if you’re going to die, this is the way to do it.